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The term “Orbiting” pertains to a contemporary dating pattern where an individual from your history, often a past lover or someone with whom you once had romantic connections, sustains an online presence in your life without necessarily participating in significant communication.
This person lingers in the outskirts of your life, intermittently liking your social media content, watching your stories, commenting on your posts, yet without fully reinitiating contact or making clear their intentions.
Multiple reasons can motivate orbiting:
Difficulty in moving on. Endeavoring to completely disconnect from a person for whom you still possess feelings can be emotionally taxing.
Dopamine stimulation. Regularly perusing the social media profiles of an ex-lover can lead to dopamine surges, which serves as a reward for curiosity, although it might not assist in recovery.
Maintaining a back-up. Some people might resort to orbiting as a strategy to preserve their previous partner as a potential safety net should their current relationships fail.
While this pattern of behavior might not initially seem harmful, it can lead to detrimental psychological and emotional outcomes for those who are being orbited. This seemingly innocent digital activity can deteriorate in a few ways, here are three:
1. Orbiting Can Escalate Into Physical Stalking
Orbiting might start off innocuously but can potentially evolve into something hazardous. Some people who orbit might develop an obsession, scouring for information that goes beyond what’s accessible online. They could show up at places that you commonly visit, send unwanted messages, or attempt to monitor your activity.
A 2019 study classifies stalking as repeat conduct from the perpetrator that triggers a fear of harm in the victim. It encompasses strategies such as surveillance, life invasion, intimidation, deception, and could even involve your friends and family.
Stalking can have extensive consequences, resulting in public embarrassment, disruption of life, and possible consequences for your close acquaintances. It can also involve threats of physical harm.
The shift from digital to physical stalking jeopardizes your safety and overall well-being. Approach with caution and remain alert in recognizing and addressing such behaviors. Do not hesitate to bring any suspicious behavior to the attention of your loved ones or law enforcement.
2. You Could be Left Puzzled by Ambiguous Signals and, as a Result, Feel Stuck
Regular likes, views, or comments from someone you once shared a close bond with can generate ambiguous signals and keep you puzzled.
You might find yourself questioning their intentions and considering if they are attempting to reignite the relationship. This uncertainty can keep you emotionally immobilized, hindering your ability to move on and find closure. It’s essential to understand that orbiting doesn’t necessarily indicate earnest interest or commitment. Instead, it fabricates a false notion of emotional involvement.
Their constant online monitoring might give off the impression of caring, but in reality, it requires minimal effort and is perhaps the least a person can do to stay present in someone’s life. Clinging onto this sham hope can obstruct your personal development and emotional recovery.
3. Confirmation Bias Could Trick You Into Believing They Remain in Love With You
Confirmation bias refers to individuals’ tendencies to favor information that supports their preexisting beliefs and expectations. It affects the decisions people make about the information they pursue or avoid, shapes the processing and interpretation of information, and influences how they store it in their memory.
When someone consistently orbits around your online world, you might interpret their actions through the lens of past romance, convincing yourself that they still carry romantic feelings for you, even when there’s no concrete evidence supporting this.
In reality, orbiting could serve the personal interests of the orbiter by offering them a sense of control and an emotional safety net without any real commitment. Clinging onto the thought that they still love you can trap you in emotional turmoil and obstruct your journey towards healthier and more gratifying relationships.
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Conclusion
While orbiting may seem harmless on the surface, it can inflict serious adverse impacts on your emotional well-being and personal safety. Recognizing these risks should act as a trigger for implementing protective measures. If you find yourself in such a situation, it’s important to establish boundaries, create distance, and seek support from loved ones or a mental health professional to navigate the complex emotions it evokes.
